Scary

[averygoodun42]

Geoff, Babe and I went to a pool party today at the church choir director's place. Beautiful house, beautiful pool, lots of food and lots of kids. Fun times for all.

As things were winding down, the hostess gave a small tour of their house (it's new to them) which I greedily went on (I love looking at other people's houses!) and we chatted and looked and chatted and plotted and suggested and chatted. It was getting pretty late, though, so we headed back outside to try and round up people.

Now, I should say that, although it was a pool party, I was not equipped to swim. My swimsuit is about 14 years old, and is, not surprisingly, a little too small for me at this point. Geoff and Babe both were suited up and ready to go.

When I came out from the house tour, I went and chatted with Geoff, and Babe came over, said 'hi,' then went trotting off to the pool. When he climbed up on the little shallow end wall and stuck his feet in, I told him to stop, because... yeah. No one was in the pool at that point, and the shallow end was on the opposite side of the yard. But, it was just a few inches deep at that point, and Geoff told me not to worry because Babe had been pretending to go in for the last hour or so.

But then Babe didn't pretend, he went in. As soon as his legs were covered, I walked over to him. He was mincing about in the shallow end, very pleased with himself and feeling generally good about being the rebel. I asked or told him to come back, I honestly can't remember whether I was polite or not, but, of course, being contrary, he toodled away from me, taking tiny steps toward the deep end.

He was well out of arms' reach by then, and I was getting really nervous because I know how it is in water, and when toodling along like that, it's difficult to stop and turn around because you've created a current that's helping you forward. Momentum and all that. So, when he reached his neck and wouldn't come back, I called for Geoff. I don't know how panicked I sounded, but I think it was pretty urgent.

And then, one second later, Babe hit the deep-end slope.

I crouched at the egde of that pool and watched as Babe's face went from that happy-proud "look at me!" expression, to really scared and, I think, calling out for me.

Geoff jumped in just as Babe's mood changed. If he'd been any later, I would have gone in myself.

Babe is fine; he coughed a little and thought about crying, but didn't. I'm not so sure about me, though. The blue cast to the water combined with Babe's expression, his eyes going wide and mouth opening into that scared grimace... It's the face a mother's nightmares are made of.

Comments

[cecelle.livejournal.com]

I know that face exactly. When we first moved to the US, we lived in this cruddy low-rent apartment complex, which had an unfenced pool and a laundry room right by the pool. My son, then almost two, decided to jump into the deep end of the pool while I was carrying the laundry bucket. That's just so scary. I did the laundry with my child in a life jacket after that. :0/

[averygoodun.livejournal.com]

Not a nice face at all, is it? And as for your experience! Oh, lord! I'm still trying to get over the "unfenced pool" part. *shudders*

It does make me wonder why people are so obsessed with private pools, especially when they have kids. Of course, I wondered that before today, as well.

[cecelle.livejournal.com]

I don't think unfenced pools should be allowed, period. I think in new construction they have to be fenced, but that complex was so old it probably fell under some 'doesn't need to retrofit' clause...

I pulled another kid out of that pool one time too, who had gone completely under, mouth wide open screaming under water, while her Mom had her back turned and was blithely talking with a neighbor. Several of the families there would let their preschoolers play around the complex by themselves or supervised by their 7 year old sister. We moved as soon as we could - that place was horrible and dangerous.

[averygoodun.livejournal.com]

I think most states have laws saying ALL pools must be fenced in. Perhaps they gave the old pools a timeframe, but I don't know the specifics. I do know that I see an awful lot of pools around here that have no real fences, and it scares the crap out of me. It's so dangerous!

Sounds like a good place to get out of, and I'm glad you did!

[zalena.livejournal.com]

Oh god! I'm so glad he's okay. I still remember pulling Sam out of the pollywog pond. I will never forget the look on his face when he went under or how incredibly precious he became afterwards.

I still believe that was the moment when a a cranky and 'unlovable' baby became one of my favorite boys on the planet. He still isn't particularly cuddly, but it made me realize that I'd much rather have a cranky boy than no boy at all.

But 'pretending' about those kinds of things is no joke, even if you are a two year old without a clearly defined sense of humor, physics, or boundaries.

[averygoodun.livejournal.com]

I am, too! I don't think he was in there long enough to do more than teach him a bit of a lesson, but it's still so scary! It is a good lesson on what's precious, though, you're right.

That's what I thought, as well. It's funny where different parents draw the line, though. I mean, I had no problem with Babe climbing a biggish rock, but Geoff was near panicking when he did (this wasn't a boulder, it was still just a big rock). I figured that since we were both there looking after Babe, and could probably catch him if he fell, it was fine. Kids like rocks, they climb, all is well. And Geoff didn't seem to have a problem with Babe being around the pool by himself, while I was really nervous, visions of him looking in and overbalancing floating through my mind. Head trauma I guess is less scary to me than inhaled water. *shrugs*

There isn't really a right answer except for adequate supervision, it seems.

[zalena.livejournal.com]

There isn't really a right answer except for adequate supervision, it seems.

And the fact that children bounce. The water would make me more nervous, too.

[averygoodun.livejournal.com]

THat is the thing... Children do bounce when exposed to air, but water has its own laws and force, even if it's of a seemingly sedate nature like a pool. It doesn't allow bouncing back so much.

[timestep.livejournal.com]

First - HUGS!! I do think that sometimes kids need to learn their limits themselves. It teaches them to listen.

I'm just glad that he was learning them while you were right there to get to him when he got in over his head!

More HUGS (and a glass of your fave drink)

[averygoodun.livejournal.com]

Thank you! Yeah, I think so too, but at the same time... He's been having nightmares since, the poor boy. And it's not like we were panicking when we got him out or making a huge deal of it in front of him. :-( But yes, I'm really, really glad I was right there, although I wonder how far he would have gone in had I not been there.

(I had a bowl of ice cream instead.)

[humantales.livejournal.com]

We had a similar one (although he never got that scared look). We were on vacation in the Poconos and, with six adults, managed to get into the deep end. Goofy is behind me saying "I never swam so fast in my life. This was a big pool, with lifeguards and everything, but still . . . Scary!

I'm glad to hear Babe is OK, as are his parents. (I agree with the drink idea though.)

[averygoodun.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it's amazing how quickly we can move when our children are endangered! Adrenaline is an amazing thing.

Yes, everyone's fine, pretty much. (I had a big bowl of ice cream as my sedative. It was a good thing.)

[ashfae.livejournal.com]

Oh God! I've never had an experience like this...I'm sure it's inevitable that someday I will. I'm so glad you're all okay. And I definitely third that get a drink idea.

[averygoodun.livejournal.com]

I hope you never do. It does seem inevitable, but we can still hope. A bowl of ice cream helped me calm down, and so now all is pretty much well.