I need a day off

[averygoodun42]

My legs feel three times as heavy as they're supposed to feel, and I don't think it's just the benadryl hangover. In fact, I don't think I have a benadryl hangover. I am just really, really tired.

My dreams last night were about trying to get alone time, and failing miserably. I couldn't even take a shower in peace. And the funny bit was that when I complained in the dream about it, everyone sympathized and said they understood and made certain accommodations (like refraining from moving furniture that made a bathroom private while I was using the bathroom), but no one left me alone.

So, I think I may be peopled out.

It was a good weekend, though. Just... I need a day off now.


I must confess, I have mixed feelings about Page's good A1C result. If his blood sugar isn't the issue, then his brain chemistry is. Which means drugs are going to be the answer. And, while I know pharmacology has come a long way (and, hell, Geoff and I both depend on psychiatric drugs for our own health and happiness), it's still scary to me to inflict them on a growing brain.

But, on the other hand, if the brain chemistry is messed up and carving all these horrid paths in Page's brain, if there's a drug out there that will help his brain grow in a healthier way, then it would be stupid to deprive him of those drugs! That said, I will be asking his counselor today if she does EMDR, and if she does, if she thinks it might help Page.

Poor kid. Anxiety is a tough thing for anyone, and that is definitely Page's main issue.

Fortunately, all this should be on its way to being resolved this week. His psych eval is on Wednesday morning.


In other news, I hate heat. It keeps me from going outside, and when I don't get outside, I get grumpy and blue. It's much cooler today, with a very light rain, and I stepped outside while the kettle heated up just to check out a few of my plants, and do some very, very light weeding. I was outside for perhaps three minutes (I have an electric kettle with an auto-shut off, btw), and it was rather amazing how much better I felt when I came back in. After just three minutes.

Perhaps it also helped to see that at least one anemone has sprouted (with another possible one), and perhaps a couple of my hardy glads as well (though I'll have to look up their foliage to make sure. I thought they had spiky leaves, like irises and non-hardy glads). Which makes me happy that that purchase wasn't a complete waste of money. And I'm hoping the birds (and/or squirrels) haven't eaten all my forget-me-not seeds (Chinese variety). Though it'll be at least another couple of weeks before I know whether they did or not.

Tomorrow I hope to get outside for a bit longer, as I need to move the last planter box. I suppose. The association manager told me they will be starting work on the back yard this week, probably Wednesday. I'm still hoping I can delay moving the box until they start filling the yard, as I'm enjoying the kale weeds. But, well, I suppose I can transplant them if I like them that much, can't I?

My poppies bloomed this weekend, which was nice. What wasn't nice was finding out they're orange. The tag said they would be deep red. Deep red, or even any of the pink hues, would look good where I planted it. Orange does not. So boo. I don't think I will be buying plants from that place again, actually, as their plants aren't as reliable as some other nurseries around the area (including big box stores). Shame, but ach well. Meanwhile, when it goes dormant, I will transplant the poppy to the backyard somewhere. Or give it away. It depends on whether or not they take out a couple of the trees in the swamp when doing the retaining wall. And I will have to think of what I'm going to replace the poppy with. It's a full sun location which means almost limitless options. :-)

But now that the coffee is starting to kick in, I should go do... something. Coursework, probably. I'd like to get done well before Sunday this week. Last week was a bit more overwhelming than I expected.

Comments

[septentrion1970.livejournal.com]

Lately I dreamt I was traveling on a whim and remembered I had to call the husband to tell him to take care of the daughter only when I was arrived.

I'm sorry Page has to face anxiety so young. It's a horrible, er, disease isn't the right word. affliction? to have at such an early age. I wish you and your family the best ♥

[dickgloucester.livejournal.com]

A friend of mine in Switzerland struggled so much with her young son before finally accepting that meds were the way to go. She said some time afterwards that it was the best thing they could have done, because he was transformed from an unhappy and difficult boy into a child who was much happier with himself and the world around him, and much more able to cope.

I completely understand your reluctance, but if chemical help is what Page needs, then be thankful it's available. *hugs you*