I have been crowned

[averygoodun42]

And they're riding just a wee bit high... But fortunately I have to go back to the dentist to get my new cavities filled in two weeks, so the high bite can be dealt with then.

I hate my mouth.

In related news, I think I may have gotten stoned today off of aleve and tylenol during my dentist visit. Not quite sure "stoned" is the right description, but it was close. It felt nice, if a fair bit soporific.

Ah well.

It is school vacation week, so I am trying to cope with the constant company as best I can. This has involved escaping into the basement to work (or just stare) for as long as I dare to (I don't want to incite the pouts of the emo-demon that's taken up residence - things start breaking or going wrong when we interrupt its alone time), and sleeping as much as my schedule allows. And coffee. Coffee is wonderful stuff. Too bad I can't tolerate it more often.

Hell, I even delved into coloring this week. Normally I can't stand coloring because it feels like cheating to me. I'm all for other people coloring for any or no reasons, but it ratchets up my anxiety rather than relieving it. However, I found myself in that uncomfortable state where I was physically fatigued, but not quite brain-dead enough to just watch videos. So, I colored as I watched... whatever it was that I watched. (Fatigue does not help one retain memories.) I chose a geometric design that I've colored like a quilt, though I'm not sure I'll ever finish it. I s'pose that depends on how I feel tomorrow.

*sigh*

Stress sucks. Literally. I am trying to hold onto all the advances I've made health-wise, or at least be able to compare myself favorably to some time in the past, but... I need the basement to be finished and usable and my teeth to be dealt with pronto. And for Geoff to heal! Lord, I miss his touches, but I don't complain (to him) because I know he's in pain, and touching me makes it worse. It's got to be hell for him... But, yeah. I miss that form of comfort and love.

So, yeah. Stress sucks. But I'm - dare I say it? - hopeful that some of the stressors are coming to conclusions. Maybe by the end of March the basement will be finished and usable. Maybe Monday's doctor appointment will be the start of Geoff's healing. Maybe with both of those calmed, I'll be able to deal with my mouth issues without needing ice cream and cinnamon rolls and other (GF) goodies to go with the buckets of tea I'm consuming. Because, yeah, I know that's not doing my body any favors. But I'm not going to beat myself up about it, either, because there's only so much a person can deal with without breaking. And since sticking to the diet along with dealing with everything else was breaking me, and the diet was the only variable I could (and can) control, it's the one that gave.

We do what we must to survive.

Right. Enough rambling. Time to put the bone broth in the fridge and go to bed. Tomorrow has errands and crap to do, so rest is needed.

I hope all is well with you. And if it isn't, I hope you can find the comfort you need to get through it.

Comments

[dickgloucester.livejournal.com]

*hugshugshugs*

I wonder what would appease the demon? You need to find out what it enjoys and promise you'll do what you can when the basement's finished, so it can feel part of the family and turn its attention to defending your home from outside bad influences.

[averygoodun.livejournal.com]

A friend will be smudging the house this weekend, so, yes! I will meditate and see if we can incorporate a blessing of good welcome. Excellent idea! Thank you!

And many *hugs* back!